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Each of us has a mental "bucket".
It is our reservoir of positive energy that enables us to engage other people with good will, kindness, thought, generosity, care and concern, acceptance and respect.
And all our buckets have leaked to some extent or others.
At a time when our buckets are well stocked and not dripping much, we feel good about ourselves and the way other people treat us as “nutritious” - we feel good about ourselves.
And when our inner buckets fall off, we tend to treat others in a way that we perceive to be “poisonous” - we say and do things that make them feel offended, insulted, ignored, devalued, disrespected, disliked, or unpleasant.
Most of us have a laid back attitude when it comes to painting a picture about ourselves. Some days we are more “up” than others, But in the long run most of us realize the importance of expressing this positive energy to the people around us.
And then there are people whose buckets are constantly low and leaking.
When people (including you) say or do ruthless things, you find mental buckets leaking easily. Who likes to give “needles” to others; Which should always be right; Who is an old-fashioned debater; Which shows how smart he has always been and how dumb everyone is; Who proudly pays attention to himself; Which is just rude and insensitive - they all have leaks.
As their self-confidence increase, their inner buckets begin to leak and kindness diminishes. They need to "number" someone.
Consequences: Toxic behavior and isolation from others.
Check your bucket for leaks.
You may conclude that your inner bucket is leaking or shrinking at a particular moment if:
You don’t feel moody, short-tempered and friendly.
You “fly the handle” on small promotions.
When someone speaks to them, you start arguing with them and you refuse to talk to them for their satisfaction - unless you defeat them.
You feel the urge to “fix” someone - give them unsolicited advice; Preach to them; Showing them to be wrong; Or make fun of them.
It comes when we get angry or irritated about something we "kick the cat" - or a person - that has nothing to do with it.
Think about the toxic behaviors you have seen in others and in yourself and add these own symptoms to this shortlist.
How do you fix a leaky bucket?
Fixing a bucket of spills is about putting yourself in a good mood. Find that generous, caring person again and hand him or her over to you. Part of the emotional recharge is mental - changing your “outlook” in a matter of seconds and part of it is actually physical.
For example, you can change your mood by changing your posture. Stand up, look up, spread your arms over your head, take a few deep breaths and remind yourself how lucky you are to be alive. Don't move around, exercise your muscles, take a few more deep breaths, "Be a good person."
Then bring “gratitude.” Get a memory of the specific emotional state you were in when you weren’t right with the world. You are grateful for everything in your life and you want the best for others. Fill your body - or your bucket - with that feeling and it will be easier for you to give positive energy to others.
And like you and I know you get back what you give.
Yorumlar